We all have flaws. Some flaws are superficial and can be corrected, while other flaws reveal a mental and moral deficiency. Some people are willing to work at fixing their flaws; consider giving them a chance to do so. Other people won’t change; ending the relationship might be the right thing to do. It’s your call.
Read more "An Ex Revealed: No Flaws Edition"
It’s THAT holiday. I’ve had a man in my life on Valentine’s Day exactly three times: once in my early college life with my first-ever boyfriend, when I was married to WHN (what’s his name for those who wonder) for four years, and a few years ago when I returned to the dating scene. All […]
Read more "Bitter is as Bitter Does"
Not only did the smell permeate throughout the house, the brand new bucket I purchased for this purpose is now infused with a strong garlic-bay leaf-pepper odor. So much for relegating the brine bucket to a more practical role as a mop bucket.
Read more "Turkey Day Reflections ROAD Mom Style"
Today’s accomplishments include getting coffee, a weekly trip to the carwash, and sitting on the couch all morning doing some reading and catching up on emails, and writing some lesson plans for a couple of students. If I hadn’t been holed up with the side project and homework all week, I’d feel like a […]
Read more "Slacker Sundays and Thwarted Cable TV Plans"
A person can be married and feel exponentially lonely in that relationship dynamic. That’s how I felt during my marriage, which was one of many reasons I filed for divorce. Over the course of the last 17 years, I’ve been, by and large, happily divorced. My doctor and others get a kick out of reading “happily divorced” […]
Read more "Loneliness is relative"
On this last evening of 2013, in the U.S. that is, I’m hyped up on pain meds after a dental procedure and looking back over a year that was a mixed bag of almost every conceivable thing one could think of. Isn’t that the way it’s supposed to be anyway? What would it be like if everything […]
Read more "Renee’s Favorite (and not so favorite) Reflections of 2013"
I HAVE 12 DAYS OFF IN A ROW for the first time in 13 years. In truth, my boss “encouraged” me to take the time since I’ll lose it if I don’t. At risk of losing momentum and seriously crippling my mojo, I took the time off. It’s a blessing really, because I have my […]
Read more "Insurance rates, mama bears, homework, and holiday staycations"
Friday evenings are mine. With my full-time job, running a part-time tutoring business, and going to grad school, I treasure the final evening of the traditional work week. TGIF indeed! It was one of those Friday evenings a couple of weeks ago that the little blue bell next to my name lit up. What’s his […]
Read more "Google knows best?"
During my marriage, I did housework for three, cooked for three, washed laundry for three. For me, managing these responsibilities was easier because I left the workforce while pregnant with my son. Upon filing for divorce 16 years ago, I went back to work and back to school full-time. All while going to divorce court, […]
Read more "Got dishes? The Rule of Four and Two"
As a divorced forty-something woman not dating at the moment, I miss full-service gas stations and being able to bribe the current man in my life with promises to make it worth his effort if he’d just air up the car tires. While driving to a doctor appointment this afternoon, one of the warning lights […]
Read more "Gas Stations and Bribery"
My gmail SPAM filter sends all spam to my Trash folder. This spam includes notifications from a dating site I’d joined years ago but had since forgotten about. Thought I’d share some pick-up lines that were obviously selected from a list for your evening’s entertainment. “Why aren’t you in jail? It’s illegal to look that […]
Read more "Come on!"
The uh-oh’s of life happen; however, I believe that a little planning ahead can help. If I have an idea about how I will handle the unexpected, I experience significantly less stress and am much happier. Having a solid backup plan, or two, is essential for the survival of us divorced folk, especially those of […]
Read more "Always have a backup plan . . . or a really good colorist."
…but I didn’t kill the periwinkles or cannas I planted this Spring. My mini rose bush, on the other hand, is not cooperating. When we moved in to the new place, the current landscape already had a couple of crepe myrtles, but I didn’t know what color the blooms would be come Summer. Much to […]
Read more "I can kill a cactus . . ."
Ditching the former married name for your maiden name is all fine and dandy unless you have children who carry your ex’s last name. No doubt, you either have been or will be addressed as Mrs. [former last name] again. Repeatedly. Especially by the young ones. The only human beings on this earth that can […]
Read more "They call me, Mrs."
Daycare was both my saving grace and my worst nightmare. When I had to go to class or work, daycare was there to watch over Bo while I did what was needed. When I was potty training him, daycare staff was not as attentive as I was at home. I know, I know…they have soooo […]
Read more "You will survive daycare, and so will your kids."
Players: Two exes; adult children 18 years and older Rules: The terms of the divorce decree and visitation arrangement no longer apply. The parent and/or adult child who arranges the event, outing, trip, etc., is tagged “it” for the duration of the activity and is responsible for EVERYTHING, including travel to and from, entertainment, medical, […]
Read more "Divorce Tag: It’s WHN’s turn now!"
Filing for divorce isn’t easy; making it for the long haul can be even harder. When you just want out, any length of time seems likes it’s too long, but you have to go the distance no matter what. In March 1998, I met with my first attorney who advised me to get a job […]
Read more "Dig in"
I’m pretty adept at working my fulltime job, running my business on the side, maintaining a home, and being a mom all without paying lawncare and housekeeping services. However, I absolutely loathed putting together the Adirondack chairs that now grace my front patio. In that moment, I wanted to be married to or dating a […]
Read more "DIY is for other women"
I’m currently traveling the world. A few short hours ago, I was in Germany before making my way to Holland. I’m thinking about stopping off in Ireland before heading to Mexico, and then to bed. Actually, I’m not physically in any of those places, but they all make great beer. If you read my last […]
Read more "Remind me tomorrow why I dig this pre-empty nest thing"
It was surreal seeing my only graduate. In the abstract, and when he was young, I knew this day would come. Then, I found myself in the moment, wondering where the time went and if it was real. I cried a little, recalling the day he was brought home from the hospital with an apnea […]
Read more "Of tassels and tears"
My home state has been hit hard the past two days. A former classmate lost her home last night, and other friends are searching for loved ones. The devastation is surreal and worse than the May 3, 1999 tornado according to some accounts. Ways you can help those affected by the tornadoes in Oklahoma: Donate […]
Read more "Pray for Oklahoma"
. . . the best thing you can do is let us bend your ear, cry on your shoulder, and feel the comfort of two arms holding us as we work through our feelings. And we will. Please, however, refrain from words of advice that are akin to “get over it”. This advice, sometimes meant as […]
Read more "Until YOU are divorced"
I believe in the power of a daily dose of chocolate and a pedicure every two weeks. These are the two indulgences that I give myself without fail. The first because I just like chocolate, almost any chocolate. The second, however, comes with a back massage and a glass of wine. Talk about a treat! […]
Read more "I’m a mean mom . . . today."
No, it’s not real. I’ve had a busy week already, and it’s only Tuesday. I don’t recall if I’ve mentioned it before, but in addition to my fulltime gig, I own my own business and provide services that include technical writing and private tutoring. My client/student load ranges from 5th grade to college students. What […]
Read more "FREE TO A GOOD HOME!"
The other woman in my son’s life is a bit of a mystery. My ex invited her into my son’s life 14 years ago, and then promptly married her within a few weeks after the divorce. I know only the color of her eyes and hair, about how tall she is, and what my son […]
Read more "Guess who’s coming to graduation?"
He was tall, around 6’4″, with lean muscles, dark hair, and blue eyes. Not a pretty boy, thank God, but good-looking and a really nice guy to be around, in class at least. Just my type. The sad thing is I was so blinded by busyness and the responsibilities that accompany parenthood and a graduate fellowship […]
Read more "Don’t pass on the 28-year-old hottie"
Standing in line five people deep. Not being able to find what you need because they moved it . . . again. The was pricing that never was. I loathe shopping at Wal-mart. Yet, whenever I got to go shopping sans child, it was the most exciting thing to me because I got to go ALONE. […]
Read more "I have a love-hate relationship with Wal-mart"
Yesterday, I was getting a pedicure at my favorite nail salon and trading mom stories with the nail tech. She is a mother of a three-month-old, and I’m the mom to an 18-year-old. As working moms, we can miss some of those little things that our kids do while we’re at the office but not […]
Read more "When my son thought I wasn’t looking"
Healing after the demise of a marriage takes time, but even then, a tiny dot remains over the gaping hole of disappointment. When I look at that tiny dot closely enough, I see the scab left 13 years ago. Though it’s best to leave it alone, it does annoy me now and then. But only when […]
Read more "You’re going to pick at it sometimes."
I was grocery shopping midweek recently and noticed a nice looking man, dressed business casual and within my age range standing in the bakery section. Yes, I looked and appreciated, and then I moved on. Shopping, remember? What struck me as odd about the man was that he seemed completely engrossed in reading the week’s […]
Read more "Flirtations over Ramen: Giving it the ol’ 50-cent try"
I was swinging my son on the swings in the courtyard of the campus apartment complex when I looked up and saw a man standing by the laundry room. He was far enough away that I couldn’t make out his features exactly, but he looked familiar. In fact, he looked a lot like my little […]
Read more "When the P.I. looks like your little brother"
My morning was off to a bad start. I woke up late and have a pending deadline to meet at the office. I’m on edge–looking, hoping, expecting. As I stand in front of the coffeemaker at the Circle K, confused and lost, he walks up alongside me and says those three little words: “Here, let […]
Read more "The three best words you can say"
But, Renee, that money helps me clothe and feed my kids, and sometimes, helps pay for things like little league and dance class. If I save or invest it, the kids wouldn’t be able to do those things. And I don’t pay child support to my ex just so it can be put in the […]
Read more "Invest the child support"
Science can explain the color of the sky and other phenomena. Other things, like why the dryer eats the socks, simply can’t be explained. They just . . . are the way they are. Children are their own individuals, an amalgamation of you and their mother or father. They are who they are, but when […]
Read more "For a split second, I see the ex, not the child."
It’s an evening at Summer’s end, just cool enough for a bonfire, light jacket, and time spent with friends. The tailgates are down, and I’m sitting on one of them with a bottle of my favorite tequila in one hand and a shot glass in the other. My friends, who tagged along for support, are […]
Read more "Healing Power of a Tequila Fantasy"
2013 is here and I can’t believe a real vacation just might be in the cards this year. Job responsibilities and schedules look like they might align perfectly. The choices of East Coast or West Coast and fly or road trip seem overwhelming, and I can’t help but smile. My son hasn’t been to the […]
Read more "Give the staycation a week off"
My son, affectionately called Bo (biological offspring), has changed his phone number three times in the past three months. It’s his money, and I attributed it to being on the cusp of adulthood. Make no mistake, I had a lot to say about his mindless expenditures, and he learned a valuable, expensive lesson. Each time, […]
Read more "Let What’s His Name lie in his own bed much, much sooner."
Dating was an abstract concept for several years after my divorce. After spending three years attending university and being in and out of divorce court while raising a preschooler, my focus centered on forging a career in technical writing, making a good living for us, and being a mom. Dating was, quite frankly, more work […]
Read more "Date more, fear less"
I like things clean and orderly, but I’m not a neat freak. When my son was younger, I attended school fulltime while completing my undergrad degree and worked, which meant that evenings and his nap time on weekends were dedicated for my homework and studying. Saturdays were always our Day o’ Fun; housework could wait. […]
Read more "I took that whole “housework can wait, kids can’t” a little too far sometimes."
DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed by the author of “The True Costs of Divorce” are solely that of the author only, and do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of roadmomblog.com or its owners/writers. “It’ll be $2,000, and the divorce should be done in 60 days.” That’s what my first attorney said; what […]
Read more "Money, statistics, and divorce"
For those of you who like romance with a little suspense, Elle Fiore is publishing again soon! “Let’s Get Physical” is a great read for one of those days when you skip the gym in favor of a comfy chair and cup of tea or glass of wine. Having just filed for divorce, our weight-challenged […]
Read more "“Let’s Get Physical” with Elle Fiore!"
I’m a goal-oriented individual; always moving toward something. Since August 2012, I’ve been pursuing a M.Ed in Adult Education in e-Learning Technology and Design through an online university, and I’ve my final Capstone Project coming up soon. I can’t say how excited I am to be completing this goal. Every Wednesday and Saturday, I have […]
Read more "Saturday’s Homework Playlist"